We’re entering a new month where we’re going to change how we think about ourselves in relationship to others, and then how that impacts our relationship with ourselves, food, and how we feel.
When we can allow other people do what they do & not make it mean anything about us or them, the likelihood that we’ll run to food when feeling disappointed or angry is reduced.
All right, so welcome to week number 17. Now, with week number 17, what we’re doing is we are starting a new focus. Okay.
And this month, what we’re going to be focusing on is relationships. The reason that we’re going to be focusing on relationships is because our relationship with food and our relationship with other people is going to be a mirror of our relationship with ourselves.
And so, it’s so important to start working on our relationships with other people so that we can start to look at what relationship we have with ourselves. And so, this month is actually going to be a pretty hefty month, but you don’t have to go through all of the material because it may not be applicable to you right in this moment.
I wanted to give you the resources available so that you could then go back. And as you come up with certain scenarios, then you can go ahead and take a look at them and use the worksheets. But you may not need them right in the moment that we’re discussing them.
So, the big topics that we’re going to be talking about this month are what are called emotional childhood and emotional adulthood. And basically, what that means is that when we are in emotional childhood, we abdicate responsibility for our emotions to other people. We say things like, you hurt my feelings, it’s your fault that I’m feeling this way, or we take ownership of other people’s emotions. So, I’m going to disappoint them.
And why emotional childhood and emotional adulthood is so important is because when we take responsibility for other people’s feelings, we actually robbed them of the human experience.
And we try to people please and manipulate them, manipulate the circumstances so that they feel better. And so, what we want to do is we really want to allow other people to have their emotional experience. We want to have our own emotional experience. And we do that by, “I don’t want to say walling off our emotions,” but we just say, “okay, this is what I’m feeling.”
And the reason that I’m feeling these emotions are because of the thoughts that I’m thinking. And the reason that that person is having their emotions is because of the thoughts that they’re thinking about the circumstances.
So, I explained this a little bit more in the emotional childhood, emotional adulthood video. But then I also have two sub videos there, which are all about manuals. Which manuals are our expectations for other people? All the other people that we have in our lives, people that we don’t even know like, politicians and people who are driving on the street. We have a set of expectations of how they should behave.
And when people don’t behave like we think that they should, then we get frustrated, we get irritated, we get all sorts of different emotions. Okay?
So, the manual video is actually a really good one. You’re going to be talking about that all through the month. And then, we’re also talking this week about boundaries. And so, boundaries are so super important when it comes to being healthy because what we’ve often done in the past is we haven’t had many boundaries around our time, around our bodies. What we’re allowing other people to control.
And so, what it’s doing is with boundaries, we are deciding from a place of self-love, what we are willing to tolerate and what we are not willing to tolerate.
And then, we are rounding out this week with becoming a diet detective video. So, in this month, what we’re going to do is we’re going to start getting even better with noticing how the food that we eat, makes us feel. And also, our exercise and our sleep.
And we have five different biomarkers for that, that you may have seen in a previous session. But we’re really going to start focusing on that again and using the body scan to really pay attention to how our different lifestyle habits make us feel physically. Because what we want to do is we want to start from a place of feeling physically good. And then, we can focus on reducing calories a little bit so that we can get to our goal. All right?
That’s all I have for you in this video. I’ll see you in the next one.