When we get rid of the transactional relationship that many of us have with our bodies (If I cut calories then you lose weight) and approach the relationship with our body as more of a partnership (I want to help you feel and function better) then we’ll start to build self-trust and a relationship with our body that will lead to optimal health and ideal body size.
All right, so in this video, what I want to talk about is entitlement and empowerment. And I did a podcast about this a while ago, but I want to bring it back up again because that podcast was titled “self-trust” and it goes to that.
So, I think that for many of us, the Guru’s tell us, we read the facts that if we exercise, if we cut our calories, if we drink water, if we eat vegetables, if we do all the things, then our body will lose weight. And then, we get frustrated with our body when it doesn’t do what it’s supposed to do.
And I think that this is a very entitled way of looking at weight loss. Because just because we do the things, doesn’t guarantee the results. When you say, well, I’m going to do the things and therefore, my body’s pissing me off because it’s not losing the weight and I deserve the weight loss. Because I’ve done all of these things, I’ve made all of these sacrifices, right? We think that.
And that’s a very entitled way of looking at it. That because I’ve done these actions, the body should just naturally do what it’s supposed to do.
And this especially becomes true when we get into plateaus. Because first of all, plateaus are inevitable, they are always going to happen. And so, first of all, when we plateau be aware that that may just be how your body loses weight. It’s possible that your body just loses weight, and then stays for a little bit, and then loses some more, and then stays and then loses.
But so many of us give up before we get to the next drop, right? I had a client who had a plateau for six weeks. But if we have certainty that what we’re doing is right for our bodies. Our bodies will eventually feel safe enough to do what it is that we want which is ultimately losing weight. Okay.
Our body doesn’t really owe us weight loss. What our body owes us is life. And it doesn’t know the difference between wanting to look good in our jeans and a famine. So, it’s really doing the best that it can. Given, the tools that you’re giving her.
And so, this is when we talk about good nutrition, proper exercise, stress relief, sleep, really being good to her, and not being a spoiled brat. And being like, look body, I gave you a vegetable today. I gave you some water. Why aren’t you losing weight and being frustrated? Right?
And so, this goes into something that I’ve talked about before, but it was way back at the beginning of the program, which has responsibility and fault.
When we talk about responsibility and fault, so many of us feel victimized by our bodies. We’re like, well, you know what, it’s not my fault. I have gluten intolerance, or my parents are Eskimos. And so therefore, they store body fat, or I was raised in a family where we didn’t eat vegetables a lot. And so therefore, it’s not my fault that I don’t like them. Okay, that’s fine.
But as an adult, it’s now your responsibility. It’s not your fault, but now it’s your responsibility to take care of yourself. It’s called adulting. And so, when we can take responsibility for our body, because you don’t have another when you don’t get to turn it in and exchange it for another body. This is the body that you’re stuck with.
And so, if you want to live a long and productive life, healthy life, you get to take care of the body that you’ve been given. Okay. Now, that doesn’t mean that you can’t eat sugar every once in a while. It doesn’t mean that you have to give up pizza and stuff like that.
But figuring out where that threshold is for you so that you can eat good, good, 80 to 90% of the time. And then, have treats the other 10 to 20% of the time and still feel good about yourself. And figuring out where if we had a matrix, where we had happiness on this side, zero is down at the bottom and 100% is up at the top.
And then, on the other side, we have strictness with our diet, right? Where zero is over here and then on this side we have 100% strictness. Right?
We have to figure out that there’s a relationship there. That the relationship between happiness in our life, and then strictness with our diet, that there’s an inverse correlative relationship there. And there’s a sweet spot in there, that okay, this is how much I’m going to eat and still have relative happiness. And still be strict to some degree with my body. So, you have to figure out where that is for you on that scale.
And so, when we’re talking about responsibility and fault, it’s not your fault that you got injured or it’s not your fault that you have the genetics that you have. It’s not your fault that you are the height, or the size, or you have the parents that you have. Right?
None of those things are your fault. But the body that you have been given is your responsibility to take care of. And so, the more we can celebrate that, the more that we can really come to terms with, you know what? This is my responsibility and it’s my responsibility moving forward to take care of her.
Then, what happens is going back to entitlement and empowerment, when we can do those things because we want to take care of her. We then, become more empowered in our decisions. We make our decisions about what we’re going to eat. We make our decisions about how much we’re going to sleep. When we’re going to go to bed? How we’re going to manage our stress?
And we do that from the place of taking care of ourselves, taking care of our body. And we feel so much more in control because no one out there then is telling us what we can and cannot do. What’s happening is it’s all coming from inside.
We are doing these things because we want to. It’s a totally different experience. And one that will set you up for life. And this ties into the victim mentality that I was talking about in the intro video. Because when we decide that we are going to eat for ourselves, we become our own superheroes.
No one out there is telling me that I have to eat this way. I am no longer a victim of the diet industry. I am no longer a victim of my body. I am no longer a victim of whatever it is out there. I am now empowered and becoming my own superhero because I can get myself out of this. I am the only one, it’s like “Dorothy in the Ruby slippers,” right?
That I am the only one that can get me out of this and back home. Right. It’s just so awesome. All right. So, hopefully, this is all starting to make sense to you. That’s all I have in this video. I will see you in the next one.